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What, I wonder, will we think of the London Olympics this time next year?

Beijing’s extraordinary Birds Nest stadium stands out alongside Sydney’s wonderful sense of party and the most amazing fireworks ever. The memory of the Athens closing ceremony still brings tears to my eyes. A young Greek girl in a simple white dress collected the light from the flame, walked confidently down the longest staircase in the world and, touching her lamp to others, spread the light to the world in a conscious evocation of the Greek Orthodox Easter Sunday. 

So what will we remember about London 2012? One thing we won’t remember is lacrosse. The previous London Olympics in 1908 and 1948 featured lacrosse (the second time as a demonstration sport), but sadly, not in 2012.

Lacrosse did not come about as an early experiment in mating a hockey stick with a shrimping net during a game of hurling. It goes back four hundred years and its roots are in games perfected by Native American communities under various names including ‘men hit a rounded object’ and ‘little war’. French missionaries tried to ban it which ensured its future survival.

It is interesting to consider why certain sports are in and others out.

The only summer sports that have never been absent from the Olympic program are athletics, swimming, fencing, and artistic gymnastics. The rest are there because of fashion and politics.

In 1904 at the summer Olympics held in St Louis, USA, roque made its first and last appearance. A sort of hard court croquet, the roque contest attracted entries from only one country – the USA, which won all three medals. Interestingly roque had replace croquet, which was in the 1900 Olympics when nine of the ten competitors were from France, which won all the medals then.

The marathon, as you would expect, was one of the original sports in the first modern Olympics in Athens in 1896. One of the legends has it that Pheidippides ran non-stop to Athens to report the victory over the Persians at the  battle of Marathon - a distance of approximately 40 kilometres. 

For the London Olympics this was taken to be 25 miles (40.234 kilometres) but this was changed to 26 miles so that the race could start from Windsor Castle. It was then changed again at the request of Princess Mary so that the start could be outside the nursery window. It was finally changed a third time to end the race in front of the royal box at the White City stadium to give a distance of 26 miles 385 yards (42.195 km), which became the standard length starting with the 1924 Summer Olympics.

In Britain, I read, they are proposing to abandon sell-by dates on food packaging.

Wouldn’t it be good, I was thinking, if the 2012 Olympics recognised, in a small way, the achievements of those who are getting a little closer to their sell-by date. A few events for the over sixties would be nice - something appropriate to our age and ability.

What about a new triathlon?

1. Getting up from a deep sofa in one go without grunting,

2. a stroll of 500 metres followed by sitting down on a comfy chair without saying “aaah” and finally

3. a brisk walk up two flights of stairs where the gold medal would go to whoever could remember all three things they came up for.

(“three things!?”, I hear you cry – well it has to be tough, it is the Olympics after all).

There would be no danger of a doping scandal – unless ‘a nice cup of tea’ and ‘a glass of decent red’ make it on to the banned substances list.

In 314 days, the London Olympics 2012 will open; sixteen days later, after 302 events in nineteen sports it will all be over.

There will be no tug-of-war, ballooning or lacrosse, of course and no rugby sevens or golf, although these two will be included in 2016, so once more we shall have an Olympic sport where ‘men hit a rounded object’. And women too of course, although we may have to wait a little longer for the unisex ‘brisk walk up two flights of stairs’.

Right, time to put the kettle on.

Let’s talk.